Do You Want to Be Well?

Our lives are a journey. We have mountains to climb, and what we lug around with us determines how soon we reach our destination... or if we make it at all! Sometimes the weights we're lugging around are so heavy and make the journey so arduous, we turn around and give up because we simply can't go any further. So the key is simple - to deal with the weights before we begin. Or at least, to turf them out of our packs right now, even if we've trudged for many years carrying them around and are feeling the exhaustion of it. In other words, let's deal with the root of the things that could cause us not to reach our destination.

Jesus was very good at dealing with the root of the matter. He didn't pull any punches and He didn't avoid what needed to be said. Never more was this the case than with the paralysed man at the pool of Bethesda. And what He dealt with in that man there, He wants to deal with in each of us today. Because honestly, we can't move forward in any areas of our lives without it. This really is the starting point for every single person.

It would seem pretty obvious that any man who had been lying on a mat, waiting to get healed for 38 years, would be well and truly over it! His desperation to be well would surely be unquestionable, wouldn't it? That's what the people surrounding the paralysed man must have thought when Jesus came along. In fact, they were probably offended at Jesus asking the question He put to the man. "Do you want to get well?" Couldn't He see that this man had wanted that for a long time?!?!?!

I've been to the pool of Bethesda, in Israel. When I was there, I couldn't help but imagine all of this taking place as Jesus spoke to this man who had been lying there for almost as long as I'd been alive. That is a LONG time to be sitting around, waiting for something to change. Yet Jesus knew that what was going on on the outside of this man, was not actually the problem. But rather, what was going on, on the inside. The paralysed man indicated that he wanted to be well, but all he could give Jesus was excuses and whining. In other words, resistance. Out of the abundance of his heart, his mouth gave him away. And his lack of action was testimony to the way his heart had limited him. Was it because his identity was in being paralysed, and he didn't know how to live any differently? Was he afraid in the depth of his heart that if he was well, he wouldn't be able to beg any more and he didn't know how he would survive financially? Was it something else - some other secondary gain that he would lose if he were able to get up and walk again?

And so Jesus asked the question that would expose his heart and challenge him... the answer to which would determine whether or not this man's heart could be unlocked, and therefore if his body could be healed. Jesus started with this question because it was the foundational issue that would trip the man up (and in fact had). And He is placing this same foundational question before us today, because if we don't deal with this in our hearts, we won't be able to move forward into all He is inviting us into.

"Do you want to get well?"

"Do you really want to get well? Because salvation is free, but coming into alignment with your salvation is costly. It’s going to hurt your emotions as you take the crown away from them. It’s going to challenge you to look into the deep places of your heart and take responsibility for what is there. You’re going to have to give things up that you’ve had your identity tied up in for so long. You are going to have to move forward, when others want to hold you back. Do you really want to get well? Because if you do, I’ll heal you. But if you don’t, I can’t.”

While we probably read this story and are shocked that someone would lie there for 38 years when they could be healed, Jesus would point out that many of us are doing the same thing today. What mats have we been lying on for 38 years? What messes have we been accommodating? We would never think we would lie there when we could be healed, yet this is exactly what many of us have done, in different areas of our lives. We're still overweight when we say we want to be fit and trim. We are living in poverty and lack when we say we believe in abundance. We're holding on to sicknesses when Jesus paid the price for us to be healed. We're still living for the expectations of others, instead of our King. We have a message inside of us, but keep holding back from sharing it. Is it possible that in our hearts, in some measure, we are in agreement with something that keeps our hearts from taking us where we want them to go? Is it possible that deep inside, we actually don't want to get well?

Is something worth more to us than getting well? Pride, attention, the secondary gain of staying in the present situation, or not having to face the fear we'd rather not face? Some people aren't truly willing to look into their hearts and take responsibility for what is there.

If you don’t want to get well in the depth of your heart because you feel the price of getting well is higher than the price of staying the same, you will experience ongoing resistance and will ultimately self-sabotage.

The thing is, much of the time, even we don't know what is in our own hearts. It's only God who can tell us what's really going on in there. But God is a master at exposing lies. He sees what we cannot see, and if we will invite Holy Spirit to shed His light on what's going on inside of us, and be willing to deal with what He shows us, we'll be able to partner with Him to uproot all that tries to stop us. And we can do it today!

So let's partner with Holy Spirit and look at what some of the indicators are, which tell us that in the depths of our hearts, we don't actually want to be well, or in other words to walk in victory.

Resistance: We know that we want to do something or even that we should do it, but it doesn't seem to matter what happens, we just don't get around to it. There's always a reason not to do it. There's always something which might seem quite coincidental to prevent us from doing it, yet it happens time after time. We just can't get our hearts to go where we want them to go, yet in our heads, we still think we're going to do it, which consoles us. We still have a strategy up our sleeve and tell ourselves we just can't find the time or money to get it done, but we're going to do it. In reality, if we've 'decided' to do something, and we just never get onto it, there's resistance in our hearts about it, or something related to it.

Cycles of Failure: We decide to do something, set our hearts and our hands towards success and make progress. However, either just before we succeed with it, or just after we experience the achievement of the aim we've set, we experience a failure in one way or another. It could be an emotional meltdown. It could be spending all of the money we've accumulated. It could be giving up and not finishing. The thing is, when we put our hands to the next thing, we realise that we find ourselves in the same or similar outcome... we get so close and then everything crashes down. Is there a a cycle of failure recurring in your life or in any area of your life?

Self Sabotage: Self sabotage is hands down the saddest thing I have ever seen, yet it's real, and far more deadly than satan himself! When we come into agreement with satan's plan for our life and his identity for us, we empower it. Satan actually has no power. The only power he has is deception - deceiving us into agreeing with him and giving him our power. Who needs an enemy when we're going to suicide? And in the spiritual realm, that's exactly what self sabotage is!

I have seen people who say that they genuinely want to have a happy marriage do everything they can to destroy it. I have seen people who say they want to be healed and yet be so tied to the identity and idol of sickness in their lives that they can't help but focus on it and glory in it (yes, you know the ones, who want to tell you all the time about how sick they are, how many specialists appointments they've gone to, and schedule their lives around their sicknesses). I have seen people who say they want to lose weight overeat continually on the most unhealthy foods they can find. What is this about?

It's self-loathing, self-rejection, worthlessness, not truly receiving in our hearts the love of Christ, and not knowing our identity in Him, or our value and worth because of Him. Christ thought we were worth dying for, but many people still struggle in the core of who they are (usually thanks to religion or shame) with a sense of unworthiness, and worthlessness. Deep down their hearts, they don't really believe that they deserve to be well. Therefore, without usually even realising it, they self sabotage to keep their circumstances and their lives consistent with their heart belief that they don't deserve it, or shouldn't be well. They will sabotage relationships, finances, even their own health and wellness, by manipulating, overspending, creating strife, not looking after themselves, or a whole myriad of other self sabotaging actions, in order to stay 'unwell'. In actuality, it is partnering with satan to destroy our own lives, and it is far more common than you would realise. But if we identify it, there's nothing that can stop us from being free.

You may well be reading this blog because you want to move forward in your life, and you may also be considering being coached. Our purpose is to help you to discover and live the wide-open, spacious life Jesus designed for you to live. And that journey begins with this step, because if in the depths of your heart, you don't want to 'get well' and you refuse to deal with the underlying causes of that resistance, no coach can help you - and neither can Jesus. But on the other hand, if you DO want to get well, no one can stop you!

So if you've noticed any of these indicators in your life, it's time to face this unpleasant truth head on and deal with it today, to set yourself free for all of your tomorrows. Once something has been exposed, it can be expelled. You can download our 'Do You Want to be Well Progress Sheet',to help you to work through the process of setting your heart free.

Be excited and expectant! When you truly want to be well, there's nothing that can stop you from walking in that victory in every area of your life. And the next blog will show you how...